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By Mom Unplugged, May 20, 2008 2:11 pm

Despite writing a blog for all the world to see, I actually tend to be a rather private person. I am very bad at self-promotion, but I have news that I simply can’t keep to myself any longer.

That picture above may look like any old page from any old book to you, but to me it is astonishing, amazing, and quite unbelievable. It is something that I must pick up and look at again and again in order to be completely sure it is real.

Those words on that page, and several others like it, are MY words (“Mines!” as my 2 year-old would say). My words in print, published in a real book that is available in real bookstores for anyone to pick up and read as they sit and sip their Starbucks. A fat, solid book with a lovely glossy cover and that wonderful “new book smell.”

The book is called How to Fit a Car Seat on a Camel: And Other Misadventures Traveling with Kids and is edited by Sarah Franklin. It is a very funny anthology of absolutely true nightmare stories about traveling with children. I feel very honored that my unusual adventure was chosen for inclusion. Suffice it to say that my contribution involves a small single-engine airplane piloted by me, and a screaming, hungry 3 month-old baby (my oldest daughter).

Anyhow, I really enjoyed reading all the tales in the collection, and I often laughed out loud! I would have recommended it as a great summer or travel read for all parents, except that now I am a bit embarrassed to do so since my piece is in it. How weird is that?

Seriously though, consider reading it this summer on your United Airlines flight to Chicago, or your cross-country car trip to Grandma’s. If your little darlings fuss on the flight or vomit cherry slushies all over your new car, this book will lift your spirits and you’ll immediately feel better knowing that it COULD ALWAYS BE WORSE.

Comments (8)

By Mom Unplugged, May 14, 2008 10:58 pm

This past month I have probably spent close to 60 hours sorting through other people’s castoffs while my 2 year-old rolled around in the dirt.

Every year my children’s small but worthy, financially challenged Montessori School holds a giant yard sale, and every year I volunteer to help sort. I never work the sale because, although I find the sorting process rather fascinating in an odd way, I simply can’t deal with the actual feeding-frenzy atmosphere and depressing desperate bargaining of the sale itself.

The sorting experience is really quite enlightening however. I can share a few tidbits here.

What I have learned from five years of sorting through other people’s junk:

1) People all have different tastes:

This year I had the pleasure of discovering the number one most revolting looking and smelling giant “hand-dipped” candles I have ever encountered in my life (picture “chocolate - cinnamon - banana - lavender - cat pee” fragrance in candles looking as if they had been lovingly hand-dipped in vomit). Resisting both my gag reflex and my urge to toss these misplaced treasures into the trash, I optimistically priced them at 10 cents for the pair (other candles of that size, more acceptable to my taste, went for $1.00 each). Guess what? A lady stopped by and excitedly purchased them WHILE WE WERE STILL SETTING UP!!!

2) Sorting other people’s castoffs day in and day out makes one a little weird:

Another item that sold during set-up was our mascot: The lime green teddy bear in sunglasses and fancy flowered hat who, when you squeezed her paw, sang the Beatles song: When I’m Sixty-Four. Unlike those candles, I was a bit sorry to see her go. After hearing so many repetitions of When I’m Sixty-Four, I was beginning to think I NEEDED that bear. Perhaps it is a good thing that she was sold to someone else.

3) If you give desperate Christmas gifts to someone unlikely to appreciate those gifts, they WILL end up, unopened, in a sale like ours:

Some examples of obviously desperate Christmas gifts that the poor recipients were eager to dispose of: a John Wayne coffee mug new-in-box (NIB as they say on Ebay), several ornate photo frames with syrupy, sentimental sayings (also NIB), an electric quesadilla-maker (isn’t that what frying pans are for?), dubious-smelling candles (nothing like the 10 cent candles though!), and an actual nose hair trimmer (I don’t think I have ever seen one of those before), among others.

PS. Check out the Christmas Unplugged posts for more information on how to avoid that “have to give something” feeling.

4) Check the titles of the books you turn in (unless you plan on dropping off the box anonymously after hours):

If you have a whole box full of self-help books along the lines of How to Live With a Cross-Dressing Husband, or How I Overcame My Gambling Addiction, whether they are your books or your long lost cousin Debbie’s, then you might want to consider dropping them off after-hours. Although my friend and I who were sorting the sale were nice enough not to take notes on who made the revealing self-help book donations, others might not be so kind!

A fascinating fact: people’s books reveal a lot about themselves. Amateur psychoanalysis is a fun way to pass the time while sorting and pricing stuff.

5) Americans have A LOT OF CLOTHES.

Gold lamé jacket in East Podunk Arizona anyone?? Didn’t sell.

6) Simple donation etiquette:

Please don’t just tip the toy bin into a garbage bag and hand it over. Usually there is a considerable amount of useless junk and trash in there that needs to be thrown away. It is WONDERFUL when people bag up small pieces of toys and tie or tape the bag on to the main toy. Ziplock bags are perfect of course, or you can recycle grocery store produce bags. They are transparent, fairly large, and free. Please wash clothes before donating. If puzzles and games are missing pieces, or you only have one sock in a pair…please don’t donate. Make the sock into a puppet instead, or toss or reuse the remaining game/puzzle pieces somehow. (Unplugged Project anyone?)

7) (Warning: cliché ahead!) “One man’s junk is another man’s treasure.”

Very true. A lot of people found treasures at our sale last weekend (“chocolate/cat pee candles” for example) and we made $5,000 for our school!!

++++++++++++++++++++

I believe that everyone should spend 60 hours in 3 weeks sorting other people’s junk. I felt like an earthworm. Not only was I helping recycle all that we humans consume, but I had a lot of time to think about how much “stuff” we have in our part of the world, and how disposable it all seems.

This year, the amount of clothing we acquired is what struck me the most. I have many thoughts on clothing (enough for at least one thorough, or several “chapter” posts). Beware: I might inflict those on you soon.

Photo thanks to Wikimedia Commons.

Comments (1)

By Mom Unplugged, May 13, 2008 2:26 pm

In all the business of life, I have not yet gotten around to sharing the TV-Turnoff Week story of Mom of 2, a reader who participated in the TV-Turnoff Week Blog Challenge by email. Here is her wrap up (which she sent promptly on April 28th, sorry I am so late!):

+++++++++++++++

“We did really well through the week (though things kind of collapsed on Sunday), and it was surprisingly easy! My 4 year old got really excited by the idea that, as I told him, “lots of people are not watching TV this week.” and didn’t ask a single time to watch TV!

I put up a NO TV sign on the TV cabinet to remind us not to watch, which he loved because it started with N, just like his name. The only protest was a short tantrum one morning by my 2 year old when his brother started talking about the No TV sign and he perked up at the mention of TV and was mad that I wouldn’t turn it on.

Saturday morning the kids wanted to play a computer game, but when I said that part of the no TV week was also no computer, they moved on to other things. They spent the afternoon and evening at a birthday party, where I suspect at least one video was watched, though they only talked about the bounce house and all the presents the birthday boy received. That night, I came in from dinner with a friend to find my husband watching TV and pointed out it was still no TV week. He argued that it only applied to Monday - Friday.

Sunday morning I slept in and got up to find the kids parked in front of the TV. Hey, what happened to no TV week? I asked. It’s the weekend, it’s over my 4 year old said. Hmmm….where had I heard that before?

So after a week without TV, we’ve decided that we’ll keep it off in the mornings before daycare. It just makes it easier to get out of the house. We’ll also experiment with turning it off earlier in the evenings, as having more attention from mom & dad leading up to bedtime did seem to help the kids settle down to sleep more quickly.

I also realized what a constant presence it’s become on the weekends. I’ll have to plan more activities so we don’t turn it on just because there isn’t anything else planned.

Mom of 2″

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Mom of 2′s experience is quite similar to many of the other final posts that I read. I will definitely put up a summary post of my impressions of the participants’ experiences soon.

Thank you again to Mom of 2 for deciding to join us via email!

Comments (1)

By Mom Unplugged, May 11, 2008 5:18 pm

I don’t usually get too excited about giveaways, but dkMommy Spot is hosting one that I would actually really enjoy winning! So would most of you I think, especially if you like hanging around my Unplugged Toystores page while dreaming of a little online shopping.

If you stop by her site you can comment for a chance at winning a $35 gift certificate from Wild Dill, a wonderful store featuring organic, fair-trade and natural children’s clothing, toys, bedding, and various other accessories. I liked the look of Wild Dill so much that I felt moved to add it to both my Unplugged Toystores page and my Unplugged Eco Shopping page.

You can also subscribe to the dkMommyspot blog and/or write your own post about the giveaway for additional chances to win.

I probably won’t win since I rarely win anything, but hopefully one of you will. Good luck and I hope you enjoy checking out Wild Dill!

Oh…and the giveaway ends on Tuesday, May 13th so hurry up and enter right now if you are interested.

Comments (5)

By Mom Unplugged, May 10, 2008 1:54 pm

Decisions, decisions, decisions. Do we want undies or diapers? If diapers - then “big girl” (pull-ups) or baby diapers? Pants or dress? Which socks? Shall we dress ourself or have “Mamadoit?”

Getting dressed is not easy when you are two. It is not easy for the two year-old, and not easy for her mama.

Today was a good day for undies, we both agreed on that. Saturday, no errands, home all day. However, apparently the undies I had chosen were not satisfactory: “Nnnnno!” So I pulled out a second pair of absolutely identical undies and held them both out. “Would you like these undies or these undies?” I ask as patiently as I can manage.

My daughter M regards the proffered panties and examines each pair with great concentration, apparently not realizing that they are exactly the same. After much deliberation, she chooses one: “Dis one!” she says. As I begin to put the rejected undies back in the drawer she yells: “No, no, no! Dat one! Dat one!”

Now that The Great Panty Debate is behind us, we turn to the issue of clothing. My two year-old tiny tyrant marches off into the depths of the closet and emerges with a size four t-shirt that I was saving at the back of a shelf until she grew into it. I uselessly try to explain that the shirt is too big, but my littlest one is too busy trying to jam it over her head to listen or care. She finally flings the shirt down and it lands in a cold puddle of water on the bathroom floor. Now it can’t be worn.

After much screeching and posturing from us both, we eventually come to a truce. The wet shirt goes, but M shall choose the replacement outfit. She once again disappears into the dark reaches of the closet and reappears with a rather masculine striped t-shirt previously belonging to her brother (at least it was the correct size) and a gauzy pink dance skirt.

“Mines! Mines! Mines!” she yells as she struggles to squeeze her head through the sleeve of the t-shirt. I know better than to interfere, and sit back to watch the show. The flailing and grunting and crying escalate until she flings the offending shirt at me while barking out the order: “Mamadoit!”

“What do you say?” I ask calmly. “Pleeeeez” she responds, and she finally deigns to accept my assistance with the dressing procedure.

Total time? 24 minutes. I feel I need a nap or a glass of wine, or perhaps both…and I have only been up for about an hour.

~~~+++Happy Mothers’ Day weekend! +++~~~